If you're a type that may have bad dreams then please don't read this story. For this is not about make believe, but rather this is about the living dead.

I would have ran for my life if only I had realized that I was talking to a dead person. Because such a thing happening was so unexpected, I just never imagined that the person could have been dead when I was talking to her.

It all started out as a normal Friday night. I was a young teen and love and spring were both in the air. My girlfriend wanted to go on the Roller Coaster, so I waited on her stoop as she made all those preparations that females make even when they're going on a Roller Coaster ride.

Few males will ever understand what it is that woman do to themselve's that takes them so long to pretty themselve's up, but the wiser male of the species soon learns that time is better spent waiting on his Ladies stoop and chatting with the entire neighborhood rather than sitting on her sofa with no one to kill the time with.

I looked down to light a cigarrete and suddenly there was a woman before my eyes that seemed to come out of no where.

"Will you break my door down for me,?" she asked.

"Wouldn't it be smarter to call a locksmith,?" I replied.

"You don't understand. I've been wearing these same clothes for three years now and I need to get into my apartment to change what I'm wearing," she said.

"Have a cigarette and calm down while I call a locksmith", I answered.

"No thank you, I quit smoking three years ago," she replied.

"Oh, how did you quit,? I asked.

She grinned and said, "they killed me."

She walked toward the outside door that lead to the hall way entrance and as I got up to open the door for her she screamed," no, don't get up."

But as I got up she vanished before my eyes into thin air. When my girlfriend came out at last and I described the Lady to her and told her what happened she told me that the Lady I described lived on the first floor and had died of lung cancer three years ago.

It was then that I realized what had just transpired. A woman that had been dead for three years had asked my assistance to help her return to her grave wearing a fresh outfit.

Before that I had never even thought that there could be a fashion equation beyond the grave, but evidently there is. Until that day life and both death had been so simple to understand.

But seeing a woman that was dead for three years being concerned about what she was wearing just made me take another look at everything I had understood about life and death up to that point.

So many times I ponder what that day was all about. But the only explanation I can come up with is that there are things that we just do not understand.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

As my horse galloped ever faster along the beach I pulled back on the reigns to slow him down. But it seemed as if something unforseen was quiding the horse. As I pulled the reigns back even harder my horse bolted into the air throwing me to the ground.

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"I can't understand this. You just did me ten minutes ago and I'm feeling super horny again already," I said.

"I'm feeling super horny too. It must be those pills the girls gave me at the Club Wild, she said.

"What did they call the pills," I asked.

"They called them Ecstasy. They gave me four of them. They said take two and give him two and you'll both be horny beyond your wildest dreams," she said.

"Oh Ecstasy, no wonder I'm so horny. I wish you had told me. One pill can make you feel like fucking all day, but two pills, oh shit, I never even heard of anyone taking two pills at once. I'm ready to pull over now and do you if you're up for it," I said.

"Are you sure. You're really ready to bop me after only taking a ten minute rest." she said.

"Yeah, I'm sure, thats how Ecstasy works. I can bop the heck out of you all day long if you wan't me to," I said.
"All right lets do it then. Pull over now and take my cherry, I'm ready," she said with a lustful smile.

"Okay, its show time. I guess this place is as good as any. I'll be as gentle as I can. We'll take it nice and slow.

"So is that all this is to you? I'm just someone to pop you're cherry. No emotion, no feeling, no passion. I don't if I can do this,"I said.

She unbuttoned my shirt and started to bite my chest, but I didn't respond. Now she had my pants undone and she started to stroke my cock, but I still felt nothing.

"Sorry, I just can't do this," I said.

"You're not even going to undress me to see what you're missing," she said.

"No, I'm not. I just don't know how to have meaningless sex," I answered.

I watched as she removed her blouse and skirt. Her very endowed breasts filled a very fashionable bra that looked like it was a Fredericks Of Hollywood. When I glanced down at her bottons I noticed the heart shape deseign covering her pussy.

"You have good taste in lingere, I can see that thats a Fredericks Of Hollywood,"I said.

"It is. How did you know,?" she asked.
"Oh, I love all their lingere, its very striking,"I said.

"And how many women have you slept with that were wearing my lingere? Now I'm wondering if I should do this," she said.

"Oh, I only slept with a few million women wearing you're underwear. Yeah, we better forget about this, I'm just a super bad boy. You don't want me to take your cherry. I might be in such a hurry to get to screw someone else I may only have time to pop half you're cherry. Then you'll still be a half a virgin.You know, I have a busy schedule,"

As her fingers undid her bra I watched as it slid off her tremendous breasts. With a develish smile she looked at me and said, "now tell me you don't have the time to touch them."

I could no longer resist. I always had a weakness for big beautiful breasts. Not only was I touching them now, but I was also twirling my tongue around her giant sized nipples. As my eyes feasted on the site of her bouncing breasts my hands started to wander up her very firm and sexy thighs. Now with my cock rock hard I knew it was ready, but now I had to get her ready.

I gently slid one hand underneath the heart shaped thong the was covering her pussy and touched it gently and slowly. I could feel that her hymen was solidly firm. As I continued to run my hand under her thong I could feel her thighs start to shake with excitement. I knew she was now ready to be deflowered. I pulled her heart shape thong down her thighs and off.

I spread her legs apart and then gently placed her arms back over her head and grasped them. "I'm going to make you a women now," I said as I mounted her.

I could hardly concentrate as I felt her breasts rock wildly below my chest. I kept slipping out of her little opening. I wanted to go slow and to be gentle but her opening was just too small. At last I told her,"this is going to hurt, but just for a few seconds."

"I know that. Just do it. Do it right now. Please now,? she asked.

I gripped her arms and held her down tightly and stuffed myself hard into her. She screamed as her hymen started to break.

"Is that it now? Is it over,? she asked.

"I'm only about half way through. Two or three more pushes and that should be it," I answered.

"Do it then, just do it," she said.

As I pushed harder her hymen continued to break, but I could see that she was in pain so I gave one last super hard push to completly break through. As I plunged deeply inside of her I could feel her hymen completly break at last. I pulled out of her and said "It will never hurt again."

"Come back inside me then, I want to feel what its like without the hurt," she said.

As I entered deep inside her again she smiled and said, "you're right, no more hurt, now it feels wonderful.

"Is that it now? Should I pull myself back out now,?" I asked.

"Oh no. Please don't? It feels so good." she said.

"But I thought that this was supposed to be meaningless. I thought you just wanted me to deflower you. Just perform my little service and be gone," I said.

"No. Please forget what I said before. Oh, its happening, I'm cuming. Don't stop now. Don't you dare stop," she said.

"Okay then, I'll stick around for a while, but I can't stay for two long you know. I've got all those other millions of women that want to sleep with me," I said.

"Yes, yes, oh yes, I'm cuming again," she screamed."

All of a sudden I could feel her clitoris tighten around me. It had been a while since I was last with a virgin and I had almost forgotten just how tight their clits could get the first time.

"Why did you stop thrusting,?" she asked.

I stopped because I'm not Superman. If I thrust anymore I'm gonna explode inside you," I answered.

"So you're just gonna let it hang inside me doing nothing." she said.

"Yes, thats the plan for right now at least unless you're ready for me to explode inside you," she said.

"I don't care if you explode inside me. Just start thrusting deep inside me again and let whatever happens happen," she said.

"Okay, but you're pretty fussy about how you have meaningless sex. A few more thrusts and I'm afraid you may even show some emotion," I said.

"Oh yeah thats it. You bringing me to orgasm again. Oh it feels so good, don't ever stop," she said.

As I felt her clit grip me ever tighter I knew I couldn't hold on much longer. I knew she didn't ever want it to end, but she'd have to realize that all good things have to come to an end at some point.

"I'm cuming, I'm cuming again," she wailed.

"Im cuming with you," I ansewered.

Both of exhausted now, I held her in my arms with neither one of us talking. We both felt a peaceful loving tranquility and we both fell fast asleep.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

"Wake up, we slept all night," I said shaking her.
"Wow, its morning time. I never slept that sound before. But I so need to bathe. Sorry if I smell all stinky." she said.

"Don't worry my nostrils haven't yet completly awakend, but I'm planning on taking a nice dip in that lake over there right now," I said.

"Good, I'll join you. Lets go," she said.

We peeled off our clothes and waded naked into the lake. But we soon realized that we were not the only ones wading stark naked in the lake. As we heard sounds of splashing in the water we saw a naked couple in the water at the same time that their eyes also came upon our naked bodies.

"Sorry, we would have went to another part of the lake if we knew that you two were here," I yelled over.

The man with the women yelled, "no problem, we don't mind sharing this part of the lake with the two of you."

The woman he was with walked toward me and took a good look at my bod. And I guess I couldn't help but to give her a quick look over also. Of course I tried not to stare but she was really well stacked and was not in the least bit timid about showing off her body to me.

"The more the merrier" she said with a develish smile.

"Hi everyone," my fare cried out from behind the cover of my body.

"Do you two swing,?" the man asked.

"No we don't," I answered.

"Oh too bad," the woman said looking down below my waist with an admiring smile.

Now beoming suddenly emboldened, my fare stepped out from behind me, flaunted her naked body for all to feast their lustful eyes on and laughed.

"He's a male stripper and I've seen him getting groped by several woman at the Club Wild. I think he's a closet swinger," she said with a big smile.

"Not to sound too Clintonesque, but, how do you define swinger,?" I asked.

The woman with the man than pointed to my now full erection and said, "I think thats a pretty good explanation.

"I'm sorry, you're beautiful breasts excited me. Would you be offended if I asked if they were all natural," I asked.

She took my hands in hers and then placed my hands on her breasts and said, "you tell me."

"They're real. And their very beautiful. Thank you," I said.

"Better take him for a swim now and cool his breast-o-meter down a few notches now. See you two later," my fare said to the couple, taking my hand.

"Okay, see you both soon. Were going to sun bath for a while. I'll leave the sun tan lotion next to that giant rock over there in case you two want to sun bath after your swim," the woman said.

"Thank you, thats very thoughtful of you," I replied.

The water was very refreshing. We swam for about a half hour and talked about the other couple and about what we thought swinging was all about. I told my fare that I could understand if she wanted to do it whith another man just to compare a bit after she just lost her virginity.

I explained to her that if you only have an experience with one person you will always wonder if someone else might be better. Its sort of like candy bars I explained. There is not much difference between a Milkyway and a Mars bar, but unless you've tasted them both you would always wonder. After that philosophical discussion of candy bars I was ready for a nice combination of a nap and a sun bathe.

"Oh good, she did leave the sun tan lotion by that rock. Lay down on your stomach and I'll spread the lotion on your back," she said.

"Great, thank you. Let me know when I can do the same for you," I said.

A few seconds after she started to apply the lotion on my back, she suddenly stopped. I could hear footsteps that sounded as if she were walking away. But then I heard footsteps come toward me and I could feel the suntan lotion being applied to my back again.

But this time it felt more like my back was being rubbed down. It felt good and soothing. But when her hands worked their way down my back to my butt, it started to feel erotic.

She kept gently rubbing the lotion on my butt in a very sensual way. I figured I'd just pretend not to notice in case she was trying to arouse me to have sex with her. I just didn't want to end up having sex with her and have the swinging couple walking in on us in the middle of having sex. The body rubb seemed to intensify as her hands moved down to the back of my thighs.

Then I felt her hands tilt my body to its side. As her hands held my thighs from rolling back flat to the ground again I could feel her tongue start to twirl around the helmet of my cock. I still pretended I was sound asleep figuring that she would soon stop, but she didn't.

Then I felt her throw her thigh over mine and slide my cock quickly inside of her. That's when I knew it wasn't my fare. I could feel the difference in experience by how my cock felt inside her.

Then of course I knew that my fare was off somewhere doing the same. I sort of expected that my fare would jump at the first opportunity of having a second experience after losing her virginity, but I didn't expect that I would be having a surprise sexual encounter while I was innocently sun bathing.

But here we were now. I was already inside her. It felt too arkward to reject her. And at the same time I didn't want to give her a sympathy fuck because her man was busy swinging with my fare. But then I figured that no matter what I did, I just really couldn't do anything that would be right.

So I decided to just make the best of the situation and enjoy the heck out of it and just said "okay, lets make love.

I ran my hands over her enormous breasts as I thrusted ever deeper inside her. I wasn't into swinging but she had a fantastic body and we were already there. She really knew how to screw. With her thighs in total control I quickly exploded inside of her. But after a few minutes of sucking the nipples of her tremendous breasts, I was ready for more, a lot more.

She seemed to press every turn on button I had. And by the way she was moaning I was sure I had all her buttons turned on too. After about a solid half hour of fucking our brains out, we were at last done. With both our bodies just about on fire we decided to cool down with a swim. After a few minutes in the water my fare and the man swam over to us and all four of us laughed and splashed water playfuly at each other.

At last we dressed and continued on to my fares destination.

"Were here. How much do I owe you for the cab fare,?" she asked.

"Well lets see. I've had the company cab for two days now. The cab averages fares of about one hundred dollars a day, but since I'm sure I'll be fired anyway when I get back to the garage and you were such a great fare, your bill is zero. But I'll take a good bye kiss as a tip," I said.

"Oh, but I was so looking forward to stuffing your tip down your jock strap." she said.

"But I'm not wearing a jock strap. I gave it to the woman at the club. But you know that. And why are you unzippering my pants?" I asked.

"You know how turned on I get by cab drivers without jock straps," she said.

"But here, you want to do it here?," I asked.

"Yes right here unless you can drive to some place private in a hurry," she said.

"Okay, I know just the place, but you know they're really gonna fire me." I said.

"I wouldn't worry about that. My Dad owns the cab company, along with the rail road, the airline, etc., etc. And Daddy always gives me everything I want and I want you because you've got a way about you." she said laughing.

"Well if you put it that way, lets stop off and buy a new pair of jock straps and bill Daddy for it." I said.

"No need to bill him. He also owns that Department Store just down the street. They all know I'm his daughter there so just pick out anything you want. And lets pick out some outfits for that vacation Daddy is going to be giving us to the French Rivera," she said.

"Great. I think I'm gonna like your Daddy," I said.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

 Women had always considered me a nice guy. I guess I was comfortable for them to be around. I always went slow and followed their lead. I enjoyed living the relatively uncomplicated life of a lumberjack. But that all changed when I rode my Harley into Vegas for a weekend fling. I had five hundred dollars that I figured I could safely throw away at the poker table without getting hurt. When I hit the five hundred dollar self imposed limit I got up to leave the table.

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"Wake up its afternoon,"she said shaking me.

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2005/3/29

Skinny Dip Seduction

@ 02:40 PM (41 months, 9 days ago)

 
I suppose that just about everyone that lives near a creek or a lake takes a skinny dip at some point with a friend. Its quite a normal and natural thing to do actualy. But at least in Robert's case, he never experienced a skinny dip.

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Going All The Way

@ 02:21 PM (41 months, 9 days ago)

 Paul slid the third button from it's tight slit of her soft, pink, blouse. His heart was racing. She's never allowed it this far before. Fingers now touching, where they dared not before, Kay's heart was pounding as she felt his hands slide quickly down her blouse.

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2005/3/28

The Script About My Ass

@ 05:38 PM (41 months, 10 days ago)

  

Does anyone remember those early High School days? You know, the time when most of us started to discover the opposite sex in ernest, but we still weren't completly evolved yet. I can still remember those early day High School parties that we had.

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2005/3/27

Tim Mack Features Ellen Simonetti In This Special Story

@ 10:18 PM (41 months, 11 days ago)

 

- Jacques(Episode Two)

"Get that shirt on Jacques, you've got a lady to pick up at the Air Port." Read the rest of this entry ... (2581 words left) Permalink | E-mail this | Comments (3) My Special Princess @ 09:41 PM (41 months, 11 days ago)   Did you ever make a decision, and then wondered if it was right? Sometimes fate gives you unexpected surprises when you least expect it. Read the rest of this entry ... (1909 words left) Permalink | E-mail this | Comments (0) A Fantasy No More @ 07:23 PM (41 months, 11 days ago)   There was a woman in the water. I thought. "I better call the Bridge and tell them." I was about to turn for the Bridge. But I thought to myself. "Her arms are waving at me and beckoning me to come in the water with her." She had a radiant smile and when I looked further, I realized that she was wearing no clothes. She had the most beautiful body that I had ever seen. After months at sea, the site of a beautiful womans breasts were wonderful. I felt like jumping in the water to rescue her. But I knew we had a protocal for such things and I knew I had to get a grip on myself. I thought to myself. "Oh my God. I'm having a mermaid fantasy. Of course she can't be real. After all were a thousand miles from the nearest land and thats even a long swim for a mermaid." I knew deep down that she couldn't be real, but I wanted her to be real. I needed her to be real. After months at sea without a woman, I was going to enjoy the sight of her regardless if she was real or not. I thought. "I have to keep my wits about me." But, I couldn't help but stare. She kept waving her arms at me and revealing the most perfect breasts I had ever seen. Just then my shipmate Don appeared. He said to me. "You see it to. Don't you?" I said. "Tell me first what you see." Don shouted out. "I see Jesus." I asked. "Are you seeing Jesus as a Woman or as a Man?" Don replied. "Everyone knows Jesus is a Man." I replied back. "I like to keep an open mind on that subject." Don just laughed and said. "Man, you're whipped." I thought to myself. "Who knows whats really out there, if anything? But for sure, we all need to hit a port soon." I thought to myself. "If I'm seeing Mermaids, the entire crew has to be crackers by now." But then I thought to myself. "Maybe guys like I and Don, were really the lucky ones. Maybe each of us seeing what we wanted to see would keep us sane." A few weeks later, we hit a port at last. I went to Jesse's Cafe to unwind and have a decent meal. Jesse was sort of my little secret. She was a girl that could really cook and she always made you feel at home. I glanced up as I noticed the Cafe door open. A woman with the most fantastic body that I had ever seen, walked through the door. I thought to myself. "I've only seen that ravashing a woman once before and it was in my recent mermaid fantasy." As I poured my beer, I noticed that the ravishing mermaid was walking over to me. She had a very sexy blouse on and she had plenty of opened buttons showing off the cleavage of her magnificent breasts. I felt sheer delight as I watched her breasts bounce as she walked. Looking down I noticed she was wearing a very short and tight skirt. She moved like a sex machine. She was 100% certified pure woman. She smiled and said. "I've seen you on television." I smiled back and said. "Thank you for the compliment, but I'm not an actor, I'm just a Sailor." She said yes. "The Yankee Sailor that said eh seven times on Japanese television." I laughed and said. "Oh, you saw that eh." She said. "Yes. I'm a reporter and I tried to talk with you soon after I watched the news clip. You made my fantasy change flags." I asked? "Change flags?" She said. "Yes. Before that news clip, I had always envisioned a rustic Canadian Sailor in my fantasy, but you changed all that." I laughed and said to her. "I recently had a mermaid fantasy that looked just like you." She laughed and said. "Wow, you just topped any other line I ever heard. Why do you sound so Canadian?" I explained to her. "Since the day I was born, there was a Canadian family from Newfoundland that lived next door to me. My family and theirs were very close and I picked up an enormous amount of their words and manerisms without realising it." She said. "I find your voice incredibly sexy." "Thank you." I said, as her sexy talk was now giving me a throbbing erection. She asked. "Why didn't the Navy want anyone to interview you?" I explained to her. "That I had no idea that the TV cameras were rolling and I had no clearance to say what I said. Someone had asked me to say a few words for their scrap book. And thats all I thought I was doing." She said. "No wonder the interview was so good. Thats why it went off as being so natural." I thought to myself. "Oh baby. Do I ever feel like getting all natural with you. Months at sea without a woman and now I'm sitting here talking. Oh, I don't want to really have a conversation with you right now. I just want to make love to you. Oh, yeah, lets just go somewhere private." I told her. "The press may have liked it. But it didn't do much for my Naval Career. I was told that they got a very angry call from Washington and blamed me for setting our relations back about ten years with the Soviet Union." I thought to myself. "What the hell am I doing. Why am I talking about the Russians to her? Screw the Russians. I haven't had anything in months." She laughed and said. "Oh yes. I can see why Washington may have been upset. That clip of you pointing to the North and saying that Japan and the US must stay unified as long as there is that evil empire to the North." I said to her. "Look, this is all of the record." She smiled and said, "I understand." Just then Jesse brought over her plate, and asked. "Would you rather have it at this table?" She said. "Do you mind?" I replied. "Of course not, I always keep this table reserved for my favorite mermaids." As we talked, I realized that my mermaid, was not only ravishing, but she was also quite brilliant, very political and had a sense of humor and wit, that was very unique. I went for her, hook, line and sinker. All my little worries about Jimmy Carter and the Russians were quickly fading away. Then she pulled her chair back and crossed her legs. She had the sexiest legs I had ever seen. I couldn't even imagine sexier legs in a wet dream as nice as hers. As she crossed her legs, her skirt rode up her legs and revealed a beautiful pair of thighs. Then she leaned back in the chair and I could notice her blouse tugging at her very beautiful breasts. Then she uncrossed her legs and leaned back some more on the chair while letting her legs spread out wide from her skirt, further revealing her very firm and sexy thighs. As her skirt rode further up her legs, I told her. "I can't help but stare at your beautiful thighs. This my first day in port after being out a few months." She smiled and seemed pleased and thanked me for the compliment. Then she leaned over and placed her hand on my knee and said. "Your quite a treat yourself." I laughed and said. "Ah, I bet you say that to all your sailors." Suddenly she bent down to take something out of her bag. As she bent over I got a birds eye view of her very shapley breasts. She pulled a pen out of her bag and said. "You've got to write your ships phone number down for me." I watched as the pen fell out of her hand and on to my lap. As she reached for the pen on my lap, her fingers brushed my pants zipper and seemed to linger longer than would be expected. She didn't say anything, but I noticed she had quite a smile on her face. She turned and said to me. "I know this very remote part of the beach where I take all my Sailors. Would you like to see it?" I said sure. "I would love to see it." It was truely a beautiful and romantic spot. As I gazed into her eyes I gently pressed my lips on hers. After a few short seconds, I realised that her lips were as hungry for mine as I were for hers. As I put my arms around her and felt her breasts press against my chest, it felt wonderful again to smell a womans sweet perfume. She twirled her tongue around mine as I drove my tongue deep inside her mouth. I unbuttoned her blouse and started to kiss her upper breasts as I felt her hands unbuttoning my shirt. I unfastened her bra as she bit sharply into my neck. Her breasts felt wonderful to touch. They were firm and nicely shaped. As I started to swirl my tongue around her nipples, I could feel her hands unbuckling my belt. My heart raced as her hand reached over to adjust the lever to push the car seat back. It felt wonderful to be with a woman again. But she was very special. She was a fantasy that came true. She made all the trials and tribulations of the journey worth it. We dressed and then took a wonderful walk, hand in hand on the beach as the full Moon reflected off the water. I had found my fantasy mermaid and she had found her fantasy sailor. Permalink | E-mail this | Comments (1) Her Special Place For Innocence @ 02:20 PM (41 months, 11 days ago)   When you live in New York City, downtown represents, the up and comers, or the new money, as its called. Uptown represents the established and entrenched, the old money as its called. Read the rest of this entry ... (1729 words left) Permalink | E-mail this | Comments (1) Was I Dating An Alien @ 02:10 PM (41 months, 11 days ago)   I'm a fairly ordinary guy, but after two weeks of dating Triffy, things just didn't seem very ordinary anymore. I had taken a girl named Barbra to a drive in movie. Not sure if they still have drive in movies anymore today, but back in the 70's they still had a few drive in movies left in California along with the left over Chariots. Read the rest of this entry ... (1248 words left) Permalink | E-mail this | Comments (2) I Should Have Been A Nudist @ 01:18 PM (41 months, 11 days ago)  The other day, my nephew asked. "Could you come to the mall with me and help me pick out some clothes for college?" That really brought back memories. As I drove along the Interstate to the mall. I said to my nephew. "Let me tell you about my own fashion experience and just what it really now means to me for someone to value my opinion on clothes." It all started many years ago, when I got my first job after graduating high school. Every once in a while I would cross my legs while I was sitting at my desk. There always seemed to be a lot of laughter in the backround whenever I crossed my legs. One day, I got curious and asked. "What is so funny?" This girl sitting at the desk behind me said. "You're wearing one black sock and one blue sock again." Furthermore she stated. "You're wearing a stripe tie with a stripe shirt." When I asked. "Whats wrong with that?" The entire office started to erupt with laughter. Thats when I realised that I was a fashion idiot. When you go to a private school for eight years and wear the same uniform everyday, I guess you can get a little out of touch with what you're wearing. Compounding that factor, when I went to high school, most of the kids there had also gone to private grade school and fashion never seemed to be a topic. There was a near by Sears Department Store, and I guess we thought thats how everyone in America was dressing. Even Babs, a former student there, was picked as one of Hollywoods worst dressers. But at the time I was in the school, we were number one scholasticly in the entire nation. So maybe bad fashion can spell academic achievment. But then again, I have to wonder with all the spelling mistakes I make. Anyway, the girl that was laughing the hardest asked. "Can I go shopping with you and pick out some clothes that match?" Clothes that matched was really a new concept for me, but I was game. My charge card got quite a workout, but it was worth it and I learned what a body shirt was and my pants seemed a lot snugger than before. She really knew her stuff. It was quite a transformation. Thats when I figured out that the right clothes really do make a difference. Now that I was dressed for the world, I started to think about all the places I would love to travel to. Up till that point my furthest trip from New York had been a visit of Washington D.C. I thought to myself. "My God, I'm getting old. I'm now a High School graduate and I haven't even left the country yet." Anyway, I started doing the math. I figured on the salary I was making I could afford to go to places like the French Rivera in about twenty years. Too long to wait. I was geting older by the hour. I had to do something drastic. Then I had a brainstorm. I thought. "If I joined the Navy, I would get to see the World and they would even pay me a few dollars for coming along on the trip. I would save on Air fare and use the Navy ship as sort of a floating Hotel. I could wine and dine at the best places till my money ran out, and then I could fall back again on slumming it at the ships Mess when I had to." I figured. "How bad could it be traveling around in a Navy ship?" After all, if I could deal with taking the subway to work everyday, a Navy ship would most likely be a step up for my travel mode. So I did it, I signed up, but that pesky fashion problem came up again. Seems like the Navy wasn't very happy when I was wearing a pink shirt at a dress uniform inspection. What even made it worst was the fact that I got the same Lady XO that I checked in with when I first arrived. That night, it was very dark, and I triped over a tree bark and got my dress uniform all covered with mud. So when she noticed me in the pink shirt, she said. "You're that guy from New York again. I got to hear this. Tell us please why you're wearing a pink shirt." I said. "XO, it was white yesterday, but I had red ant problems." She said. "What kind of red ant problems Sailor?" I said. "The kind of problem when you put your Sea Bag down to say hello to someone and then a half hour later, you realize that the red ants climbed into the Sea Bag and totaly infested it while you were talking." Then she said. "Okay red ants. But how did the shirt get pink Sailor?" I said. "I decided to take my Sea Bag full of clothes over to the self service Navy laundry and just wash all the red ants out of my clothes. It all started out okay. At first I put half the bag in, sorting everything very, carefuly. But then I noticed that there was a jute box and a beer machine close by. So after a few songs and a couple of beers, I guess I got a little careless. I somehow put in a brand new pair of marone pants in with my dress white shirts and I guess the marone color ran somehow, because when I pulled the white dress shirts out of the machine, they had all turned pink." The Lady XO broke into hysterical laughter and just said. "The truth can sometimes be very funny." Then she smiled and said to me. "Meet me at the Navy laundromat at 1300, I will show you the marvels of what bleach can do." Anway, we got to talking over some bleach magic and I have to say. "She was really okay." That was what they call Navy A school. Yes, I learned a few things there. But the next comedy would be my Navy dream sheet. After you learn Navy talk at the A school, then you get to see where you are going. Of course, I thought "I was going to Europe. Oh yes, the bikini clad girls on the French Rivera, the beautiful Neopolitan girls in Naples. Yes, real civilization." Virtually everything I put in for on my dream sheet was for Europe. So when I got my orders, I couldn't wait to see what part of Europe I was going to. You can imagine my surprise when I looked at my orders and found that I was slated for Pacific duty. I went to Admin and said. "There must be a mistake on my orders." Admin said. "No mistake." But I said. "My dream sheet, I only requested Europe." Then I was told. "Its a dream, only a dream Sailor. The Navy sends you where they need you, and right now they need you in the Pacific." So, I was on my way to sunny California. I thought. "Its not Europe, but hey, they have a lot of beaches there. So what, if their void of any culture there, at least they have Mickey Mouse and Disney Land, and I always wanted to see Universal Studios someday anyway." But yet another dream would soon be dashed. I arrived at the Ship I was assigned to, only to find out that we were leaving for an 8 month West Pak the following day. I figured. "I couldn't see much of California in one day, so I decided to head to Mexico with a bunch of guys who said they were having one last fling there before we pulled anchor. And what a fling it was. They have some mighty powerful drinks South of the border. And the place we went to never closed." That morning I headed out on the 8 month West Pak with virtualy no sleep at all. I needed something to pick me up. I figured. "Well, how bad could Navy coffee be. If I could survive an entire day and night of partying in Mexico, I guess a cup of Navy Joe wouldn't kill me." I had to go up to the Bridge and get some information, I noticed there was a full pot of coffee there. So I figured. "Well maybe this will do the trick." I started to gulp down the cup of Joe, but then I noticed it had this taste, like it was oil or something. I took of the top of the pot and looked inside. There seemed to be a thick type of a tar like substance. It looked like the coffee pot wasn't scrubed in years. Of course, I was far from an expert on how to make a good pot of coffee, but I remembered what I had learned about the coffee pot, back in the office. One time I noticed that one of the girls in the office was cleaning the coffee pot, and I said to her. "Let me see what you're doing, so I can take a turn at cleaning the pot." There seemed to be a lot of heavy scrubing involved. She told me that. "It wasn't enough just to rinse out the coffee grains. Cleaning the pot of any residue makes all the difference." I was a quick learner and I took my fair share of turns cleaning the office coffee pot and everyone seemed satisfied. So when I noticed all the lead like coffee residue inside the Ships coffee pot, I knew what had to be done if I ever wanted to have a decent cup of coffee on the Bridge. I didn't want to attract any attention, especially since I was still the new guy in town, so I acted like the pot was empty. Even although it was about half full. "I said, better take this over for a refill." I headed to a deep sink, closed the door and poured that lead type film down the drain. Then I took a steal wool pad and scrubed the heck out of the pot. I could see years of coffee film going down the drain. After a few minutes the pot was cleaned and perking away. I poured a cup of the coffee and my hangover started to go away. Now I could finish up what I was doing and get some overdue shut eye. Just as I was about to turn in, I heard the Captain sreaming on the 1MC. He said. "Whoever just made coffee on the Bridge, report to the Bridge immediately." I walked back up to the Bridge wondering if someone croked or something drinking my coffee, but I figured. "Well what could I do? I got to the Bridge and told the Captain, yes, I did it, I made that coffee." The Captain stared at me for a few seconds, and said. "Are you sure you made that coffee?" I said. "Yes, Im sure." Then he smiled and said. "That was the best cup of coffee I ever had on this Ship." Then he asked. "What did you do to it, that made it taste so good?" I laughed and said. "Well, some dame in New York taught me the secret." He said. "What secret is that?" I laughed and said. "Cleaning the pot, at least once a year or so." He smiled and said. "Hot damn, why didn't I think of that?" I laughed and said, "I guess you had a couple of other things on you're mind like getting the Ship ready for an 8 month West Pak." As I headed back off the Bridge the Captain waved his coffee cup and said. "Cheers." After a good nights sleep, I went topside and took a deep breath. I was amazed at just how fresh and clean the Ocean air was. We were a day out into the deep and already I noticed a few Whales in the distance. We passed Pearl and then started to see the fish that fly. The ocean was now my aquarium. It was the begining of quite an adventure. Things happened that just seemed unreal. In fact the world almost ended one day, but I was there to help save it. As the entrance to the mall came up, I said to my nephew. "I didn't mean to ramble on the whole time." But there was no response from my nephew. I looked over at him, and then realized that he had his walkman over his ears and hadn't heard a word I said. Than I thought to myself. "Thank goodness I didn't bore my nephew with one of my sea stories." Permalink | E-mail this | Comments (1) About: Name: Tim Mack About: I like to write adventure stories. Homepage: http://timothy.journalspace.com/ Interests: Science Fiction Expertise: History, Social Studies and Global Economics. Occupation: Artist Industry: Entertainment Search: Recent comments: Give The Ladies What They Want (Chapter Two) Love your stories..It's a mixture of different... Talking To The Dead I agree with that...Sometimes we do not live just... Tiffany Stone (The Story) This story is really wonderful...Well,lets just be... 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August 2008 S M T W T F S « Jul     1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 Recent posts: The Boss (By Tim Mack) Five Months In Hell (By Tim Mack) Miracle In Yokosaka (By Tim Mack) Tiffany Stone (The Story) Talking To The Dead I Knew Her For An Eternity Give The Ladies What They Want (Chapter One) Give The Ladies What They Want (Chapter Two) Give The Ladies What They Want (Chapter Three The Conclusion) She Taught Me How To Be A Bad Boy (Chapter One) She Taught Me How To Be A Bad Boy (Chapter Two) She Taught Me How To Be A Bad Boy (Chapter Three) She Taught Me How To Be A Bad Boy (Chapter Four The Conclusion) Skinny Dip Seduction Going All The Way The Script About My Ass Tim Mack Features Ellen Simonetti In This Special Story My Special Princess A Fantasy No More Her Special Place For Innocence Was I Dating An Alien I Should Have Been A Nudist Archives: June 2005 March 2005 Meta: posts Other: Register Advertisement what's this? powered by blogHi blog @ blogHi.com